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January 18th, 2006

10:45 pm
grrr

I am angry.

Angry at incompetence, and inefficiency. Angry that I can't help effectively. Angry because I can't do everyone's work for them, and they are not doing it, so stuff is going bad.

Angry that I don't have time to accomplish everything I need to do well.

I am worried.

Worried that society is going to collapse. Worried that I won't be able to find work I love to do. Worried that my standard of living is going to significantly decrease. Worried that I haven't made the connections, forged the relationships I need to. Worried that I'm spending my time and money on things that don't matter.

I am sad.
Sad that my Dad died, and isn't around any more. Sad that I can't talk to my Mom about what's really going on in my life because it will distress her too much. Sad that I don't know how to be sad.

I am stressed, and busy, and it's hard to carry all this stuff around.